Everyone is Aging Blog

“The generation gap is an immensely misleading term. It implies that people from different generations are inherently different whereas people within a generation are inherently similar.”

This quote is from a University of Michigan student, and is just one of the good “nuggets” from the book Aging Awakenings: Assisted Living Residents Teach University Students to Overcome Ageism by Richard C. Adelman, Ph.D. which details the thoughts, ideas, and transitions of students and residents involved in an innovative program that engages college students and the residents of a senior living community.

The book details a research project that studied the thoughts and views of over 60 students at the University of Michigan. The project first had students share their thoughts on aging, which not surprisingly revealed a bias towards stereotypes that most of the elderly have cognitive and physical challenges, and that the majority of the elderly have conservative and stubborn mindsets, etc. Then each of the students engaged in a year long program where they were matched up with residents of University Living.

At the end of the program it was fairly conclusive that the experience debunked the majority of the previously held stereotypes. Every student that previously regarded the elderly as conservative, or felt that the elderly did not have the ability to learn new things before they entered the program had discarded those viewpoints at the end.

What’s’ even more exciting is the new things that the student learned from their relationships in the senior community. They overwhelmingly reported that they admired the elder’s skills in conflict resolution, their insights on death, and to many students a big surprise was that they found their insights on love and sex tremendously helpful.

I found many of the insights in this book in alignment with my own experiences in senior living communities and many of the thoughts that we discuss on this blog. Armed with the mindset that “everyone is aging”, it will be exciting to see how the students that participated in this program can help change the world and views of aging. Lets hope that programs like this will soon be required courses on campuses across the county – and imagine the all the great engagement with elders that can take place if that happens.

I highly recommend this book to staff and management of senior living communities, it should help them think differently about the value of the residents and an example of engagement with the community in a positive way.

Click here to order the book

 

Last week the residents of Sunrise at Bluemont Park and the second grade students from Ashlawn Elementary School had an opportunity participate together in a truly unique intergenerational activity.

The retirement community residents and school children had been corresponding with each other as “pen pals” but had never met in person. When they finally got together to meet in person, they all engaged in a drum circle at the senior living community. Take a look at the brief video I shot of the children and elders:

If you follow this blog, you know I am a huge fan of Alan Yellowitz and the unique brand of activities that his company, The Beat Goes On provides to a rapidly growing number of senior living communities. Alan facilitates drum circles in communities; see my previous post and a video of another one of his “sessions”.

This afternoon I moderated a discussion featuring Dr. Judah Ronch and Dr. Bill Thomas at my alma-mater UMBC. The session focused on the challenges of eldercare in the workplace.

I had a moment of clarity in the session regarding the similarities between being a working parent with young children and being a working caregiver for an elder. Since most of the attendees were parents, this seemed to be a fitting comparison.

I reflected on how I have personally been caught dozens of times over the years without a caregiver (babysitter) for my children and left with the only option of taking them into the office with me. As well behaved as they can be, this generally leads to a disruption in the workplace and very little work gets done by me or anyone else when my kids are in the office.

I rarely hear about employers or employees inviting aging parents into the workplace. However, in theory it makes a lot of sense. These are individuals that possess years of wisdom and they might actually volunteer to contribute to the productivity during their stay! I think most parents would also be very interested in seeing their children at work

Since Take Your Sons and Daughters to Work Day is celebrated every year on April 22nd, I think that the creation of a Take an Elder to Work Day certainly makes a lot of sense.

 

I don’t have a crystal ball reading on the future of social media, but I do see a tremendous benefit to a platform like Facebook in preserving each of our own personal histories. These personal histories can be invaluable to families and friends as we celebrate the passing of our loved ones in the future.

Facebook is still less than 10 years old; it offers us all an easy-to-use “journal” of ones thoughts, travels and life events. If you are a regular user of the platform, just imagine the “story” that 20, 30 or 40 years of entries could tell about you or someone you care about and could be passed on to future generations.

When you start thinking about it this way it’s easy to imagine a computer monitor at a funeral offering loved ones the opportunity to review and reflect on someone’s life through their Facebook entries, or perhaps a service that could summarize the entries into a biography.

I found some interesting articles with a different take on how social media can enable a person’s memory to continue on even in their death.

• Facebook Funerals/Memorials by Richard Smith


• Story about online memorials, from a person who lost their brother


• Death on Facebook, National Review


• Postmortum Facebook, The Daily Northwestern

Oh yeah, just click on these links to follow me or Guide to Retirement Living SourceBook on Facebook!

A few weeks ago I had the privilege to attend a drum circle conducted by my friend Alan Yellowitz at Sunrise of Bluemont Park. In all my years of visiting communities I don’t think I have witnessed such a unique activity.

The activity started the moment Alan would start unpacking and setting up his drums. Many of the residents were asking him questions about the drums and he would share information about their design and history.

Once the drum circle started, I moved throughout the community to get different video shots. Everyone I passed in the hallway was either tapping their feet or grooving to the beat.  It was great to glance into an office and see someone working behind a desk bobbing their head to the beat.

I am excited that the community is planning to have Alan come back when some local elementary schools students are visiting. I think it will be truly a memorable experience for the children and the elders!

 

My first entry on this blog was January 16, 2009. Although I am using this to chronicle only specific parts of my life and business, this blog gives me a great way to personally reflect on the events of the year … and what a year it’s been!

Over the years I have left dozens of “hair brained” ideas in my wake. With each of these I have tried to embrace a philosophy of “plan for the worst and expect the best”. Regardless of the outcome, each journey has provided me with a learning experience that could never be replicated in a classroom.

Moving into a senior living community at 43 years old, definitely classified as another “hair brained” idea! As someone who “plans for the worst” I was prepared to return home and “abort my mission” before I even laid my head on the pillow at Paul Spring Retirement Community. However, as someone who “expects the best”, I never dreamed that this “idea” would have led to me moving into 3 different senior living communities in one year!

More importantly, I never imagined how one idea could unlock a completely new perspective in my life and business. As I look back, I now have a dramatically different mindset compared to 12 months ago. Sharing some of this new perspective on this blog, at speaking engagements, business events and backyard barbeques has made me realize that I am not alone in this new way of thinking. It’s validated that every now and then a “hair brained” idea can evolve into a validated concept.

This year has reignited my passion and commitment to serve our elders and people of all ages … because “everyone is aging”! 

 

"Do you know of any retirement communities in the Boston area that do the hotel-type rental?  How would one find out about the possibilities for this type of rental?" 

I have received a few questions like this one lately. Since there is not a formal organization of communities offering this type of stay, here are some ideas if it’s something you are interested in.

• If you need to be somewhere specific, map your location on Google Maps


• Click on the “search nearby” link and type in “retirement community”. This should give you the location of the communities closest to your location.


• If that doesn’t generate a good list, contact the Area Agency on Aging in the region you are visiting and ask them for a list of local communities.  


• You want to focus on independent living retirement communities or continuing care retirement communities first.


• Once you have narrowed it down, your best point of contact will be the marketing department. Ask them if they have a program for guests to stay in their community. If the answer is yes, you may be on your way to a unique hotel stay!


• If its not their standard practice explain why you are interested. Since you are going to their city anyways, see if you could schedule a time to swing by the community on your trip and introduce yourself to the staff and tour the community. As I have stated earlier, I think this type of arrangement is best for travelers that are frequently going to the same location, checking out the location first and meeting staff is smart for everyone.

Definitely not as easy as calling in to book a hotel! Well, as I said before, this is not an idea for every traveler. However, for the right person and the right community it has the possibility to be a trip you will talk about for a long time!

 

I had a brief business meeting that I needed to attend this morning and then I was able to head back to the auditorium to catch the tail end of a fantastic program that links the residents to University of Pennsylvania students. Approximately 25 students from the University of Pennsylvania for whom English is their second language come to The Watermark on a monthly basis. Residents pair off with 1-3 students and they engage in conversation.

The intention of the program is to help the students with their English communication skills – however by the look on the residents’ faces and the enthusiasm of the conversations it’s clearly mutually beneficial. This reiterates that sometimes the best thing we can “do” for our elders (or anyone for that matter) is not necessarily to “do” things for them, instead provide opportunities where they can “do” things for someone else. I have seen first hand how much elders have been able to "do" for me in my travels!

When the program finished the “instructor” had quite a challenge getting the students to stop talking and get them to the bus back to U. Penn. Several of the students brought their cameras and were eager to get pictures with the residents.

 

I headed up to Philadelphia early this morning on Amtrak and arrived at my “hotel” The Watermark at Logan Square. I never noticed that the front desk of this community looks like it could be in a hotel! Each of my “immersion projects” in senior living communities seems to expose just how detached I have been from the details of my surroundings.

After a business meeting I was able to enjoy cheese steak in the dining room and attend a lecture with the residents in the auditorium. Several people asked me if I was there getting “my eyes worked on”. I learned that The Watermark has a program for people recovering from eye surgery at the Wills Eyes Institute . Combined with the fact that their company slogan is UN Retirement Living, I figure this is a pretty good place to explore some “everyone is aging” thinking!

Many times when I am traveling alone I am either stuck eating at the hotel bar having small talk with the bartender, or eating alone in my room. While I could have done either of these things tonight, it was great to be welcomed to dine with 4 people in a resturant that I have never met before. In addition to their good stories and curiousity about me and my life, they shared with me some impressive programs that they have participated in that link them to youth programs and schools. It would be pretty difficult to replicate this day in a hotel.

Here is a little video I made at the end of my day – definitely going to sleep well tonight!

 

I have been getting a lot of great feedback on the concept of senior living communities opening their doors to travelers! I feel pretty good about stumbling into a concept with such a positive response. Here are a few thoughts and ideas:

Good for economic reasons: Many communities around the country are having occupancy problems due to the challenging real estate market. Several people commented that the studio apartments, which many times are the most difficult for a community to rent to a resident might be ideal for travelers.

Good to share wisdom and connect the residents: Most people I have communicated with about this concept really support the mutual benefit of connecting travelers to residents. This has multiple benefits in addition to giving the community an “ageless” culture.

A great way to "test drive" a retirement community: Let’s face it, most people are a bit intimidated about making the move to a senior living community. If a community that you are interested had a "hotel" program, it could be a great way to get a taste of the community … who knows maybe your kids or grandkids might stay with you too!

It’s better than a hotel: I have discovered first hand that these communities are better neighborhoods that the ones I have lived in through my lifetime. There is no question that they have many features that make them better than the hotels I have stayed in. However, the best benefit is the people that live and work in these neighborhoods - even a traveller passing through for the night has the opportunity to experience the benefits.

I have several friends that take regular business trips out of town and end up staying in the same hotel  in the same city each time. They feel lucky if the bartender is the same and remembers who they are. Imagine the relationships that could be formed if they made their stay at a retirement community instead! It would take a traveler with the right mindset, but they would be rewarded tremendously.

Tomorrow I head up to The Watermark at Logan Square to play around with the concept a bit. As always I will try to share my thoughts and insights.

 

I have a business trip to Philadelphia planned for next week. Before I could book my hotel room the management at The Watermark at Logan Square invited me to "check in" to their Continuing Care Retirement Community instead.

I have worked hard to make all my moves into other senior living communities as authentic as possible. Although they are temporary moves, I have taken a lot of effort to put myself in a position to feel what it would be like to a permanent resident. I was very concerned that checking into a community as though it was a hotel would not be in alignment with my overall goals.

However, as I thought about it a bit more I began imagine how senior living communities might open their doors to a select group of travelers and deliver benefits to the residents and travelers.

I have some creative ideas on how this might be executed, but I will save those for future posts. My plan is to do a “mini-immersion” on this trip, I will reflect on the travel concept, but I will also be spending a time experiencing the community as if I was a resident.

Stay tuned I will "check in" on Tues, Nov. 18. As always feel free to hit me up with questions, comments, or challenges!

 

I had nice conversation the other day with Cindy Griffiths-Novak the owner of The Belvedere Assisted Living, the pioneering assisted living residence that was host to a minor league baseball player this summer.

I was pleased to learn the Cindy is a follower of this blog, and when I asked her if she was planning to host another ball player next season, she replied that some of our postings have inspired her to think about other people or groups that might make ideal "non-traditional" residents. She said that the residents are very excited, especially since the experience with Josh were so positive.

As Cindy started the process of applying to be a host family, she stated “I was a little skeptical. I was concerned about who are we were bringing into the community and the safety of the residents”. She shared that of her thoughts were quelled by the Lake Erie Crushers management and how much screening they do for their host families and players. The Crushers instill in the players how important their behavior is in the community on and off the field. “The safety of our residents in my primary concern.”

Cindy stated, “I really wanted a married player because I figured it would minimize the potential of a wild single ball player disrupting the community.”

Cindy said that Josh and his wife really embraced the situation. “I don’t know a lot of young people that honor and respect elders like Josh did. He is a really smart kid and is the cream of the crop. It was his sensitivity and the way he was raised that made it a great experience.”

In the end, the experience exceeded everything Cindy ever imagined. “Baseball is as intergenerational as it gets.”

“We called Josh the rock star because the residents would gather around him anytime he was in the community. However, when Josh was in his apartment the residents and staff honored his privacy and gave him his downtime.”

Cindy has worked in senior living and long term care for many years, in addition to The Belvedere, her family has owns several long-term care centers. Over the years Cindy has been frustrated at all the negative stories in the media surrounding the long-term care industry, “It has always been my goal to try and get some of the positive stories out there.”

Cindy had some more great news; she just found out that Ohio Assisted Living Association will be presenting her with an award at their annual conference this year. 

I am honored to have made the connection to Cindy. With her passion and leadership, I am confident that there will be many more positive stories coming out of The Belvedere in the future!

 

You might be getting tired of all my references to Josh Faiola(pictured here with the Cindy Griffiths-Novak and her family, the owners of The Belvedere Assisted Living) on this blog! I truly feel that there are so many valuable lessons to learn by reflecting on this story. I have had the good fortune of communicating with Josh after watching the ESPN broadcast on this unique host family. He clearly is an exceptional young man and serves an a fantastic role model for a great program.

What was your first thought when you found out your “host family” was an assisted living community?

Josh: My inital joke to my wife was that they must have thought I still needed rehab for my shoulder surgery.  She said it was because I listed "playing cards" as one of my hobbies.  In all seriousness though, I was definitely surprised to hear that because I had never heard of that happening before.  Most host families have kids and you’re in a basement or a spare bedroom so this was certainly an exception to that stereotype.  I was excited though because I knew it would be another experience that I would have never had without baseball.

 

How did the actual experience confirm or change your perceptions?

Josh: I would definitely have to say that I assumed the facility itself was going to feel like you were in a hospital and I was more than pleasantly suprised when I saw that was not even close to the feeling you get when you are in The Belvedere.  It feels like each room is a little condo and every room has a porch light above the door.  Most of the rooms even have little "porches" outside the front door where they have rocking chairs and benches.  The food there was also a lot better than I expected it would be.  The cooks work hard to put out a good variation of meals for the residents and I definitely enjoyed that while I was there.  I felt like it was going to be hard for me to not feel like an intruder no matter what they said but that wasn’t even close to the truth.  The residents and staff were more than welcoming and made me feel like I was a part of their community.

 

Do you have any thoughts about the concept of young people living in senior living communities?

Josh: I think that it would be a great idea as long as those young people realized what an interesting situation and opportunity it would be for them.  If someone was just looking for a place to live and not inteact, then they shouldn’t live in a senior community because they wouldn’t really get the full effect.  It’s the people who live and work at these places that make them such a fun place to be.  I do think that there was a positive impact on the residents of the Belvedere from having a young person around.  It was another way of expanding their lives and horizons outside of the confines of the Belvedere and anytime you can do that it is a good thing.  It’s a good thing for all of us.

What is your fondest memory from living at The Belvedere?

Josh: I’ve gotten that question numerous times and I just can’t put my finger on one single thing.  I enjoyed getting to know each of the residents and learning about their lives.  Watching the show, I found myself smiling when they showed the residents doing their various things.  I feel like I have a fond memory with each of the residents and the staff there which makes it hard to choose just one.  The overall experience was awesome and something that I’ll always cherish.

How did you perceive the residents felt about having a younger person in their “age restricted” environment?

Josh: Like I said before, I feel like the residents enjoyed having a younger person there.  I think there’s some enjoyment just from having a new person move into the facility but to also have that person be such a different demographic made it even more interesting.  I hope that it brought them back to fond memories of their younger days because they all led such interesting lives.

How do you feel your host family setting provided a different experience than your teammates in a more traditional setting?

Josh: I feel like the main difference between the experience of my host family setting and the traditional setting mostly lies in the number of people that I was able to come to know there.  Even in a traditional setting, you gain great friendships with your host family, it’s just that my host family had about 30-40 more people than normal thanks to  the residents, staff, and my main host family, Steve, Cindy, Ellie, and Zack.  Also, I might have learned a few more life lessons in my situation than I would have in a standard situation because I basically had 30 grandparents while I was there and we all know that as long as you’re willing to listen, you’ll always learn something from your grandparents.

Do you think this is something that should be replicated and repeated in other teams and settings?

Josh: I definitely think that this is something that should be replicated.  I’ve actually heard of a couple other guys who’ve done this too but apparently didn’t get nearly as much press as our story received.  It’s a situation that anyone running a team or having a similar need should explore when trying to place a person in temporary housing.

I read that you are working as a teacher, have you thought about ways you might integrate elders or senior living into your classroom?

Josh: I’m actually just a substitute teacher so I don’t get much say in what I do in the classroom.  It’s a cool idea that teachers should try to explore though.

 

Take a look at this video that displays playgrounds designed for the "elderly" in Japan. I am trying to avoid saying that these are playgrounds for the "elderly". I think these playgrounds could serve everyone from children, to athletes stretching before a long run, to people with disabilities, and yes … the elderly.

Because I have two small children I am hitting the playgrounds regularly. Climbing on the equipment is fun and healthy even at 43 years old. I know I wouldn’t be doing it if I wasn’t there with my kids, which is sad. I suppose we stop doing this because our culture views an adult as childish to play around on a swingset.

Playgrounds are fun and a great community gathering places for everyone. Sometimes their design and location doesn’t facilitate a diverse population using the space. The urban playground Asa and I visited near the Residence at Thomas Circle is an exception, the layout, location, and amenities in the park helped to bring a diverse group of people together.

Although Japan’s playgrounds that were designed for "children" are underutilized now, in this country we don’t seem to be having that problem. Perhaps our playgrounds can be the setting that will help connect the generations and break down the stigmas associated with age?

An article in The Daily Record this week confirmed alot of the elements that I have observed in my "travels" this year! The article states:

"Seniors are not only postponing retirement, but also looking to save time and money by living closer to where they work and play. Experts are forecasting an older-aged migration toward cities and transportation hubs."

 

If you live in a location where you don’t NEED to drive, then loosing or choosing not to drive will not impact your lifestyle that much. This is something all of us should think about regardless of our age and abilities.

Another quote from the article that confirms some of my thoughts and observations:

"Many senior communities were built with land-grabbing amenities like golf courses, tennis courts and swimming pools, so they had to be built far from the city center. Residents drive miles to the grocery store, movie theater or hospital."

In my opinion, the key "amenity" that can greatly enhance anyones lifestyle at any age is the grocery store. Look for a post or two in the near future devoted entirely to the grocery store … in my opinion the hub of any neighborhood and community.

I certainly know that my "projects" are artificial in many aspects. So when I learn about someone who is breaking down walls and living some of the concepts that we are discussing here its exciting. We just conducted an interview for an article in our next edition, I had to post this short video of "Kit", a 53 year old attorney who is a wheelchair user and lives in the same community as her parents. Great stuff!

If you want to access a 7 minute video that details their story in more depth, click here.

A few weeks ago I gave a speech about my time living in assisted living to a group of senior-serving professionals. After my presentation one of the attendees approached and told me how much my project reminded her of her daughter’s real-life experience. Her daughter’s first job out of college was teaching new mothers how to breast feed in the hospital, yet she had never actually given birth or breast fed.

Several years later her daughter gave birth to a baby, and for the first time she breast fed a baby herself. She was a bit embarrassed when she realized how much perspective she lacked in her previous position, for the first time she understood her previous clients concerns and state of mind. It was a bit humbling.

I don’t think it’s feasible to require that only people who have personally experienced a specific condition or situation be involved in training or assistance, but I do think it provides a heightened awareness to the emotional state that a person is in. This raises our sensitivity and authenticity, which ultimately can make us a better “guide” to those we are serving.

 

This weekend our country celebrated our independence from the Kingdom of Great Britain. I think that we should focus on the INTERdependence of our founding fathers working with the pioneers and settlers that made our independence a reality.

I feel that we have slipped into a modern culture that reveres personal independence and views interdependence or any element of vulnerability as a weakness.  I definitely see this in our current system of elder care and with the individuals and families wrestling with entering the system.

 

Well that might be overstating it a bit! Out of my four days in the hospital there was one day that definitely stood out as the best. It was the day that a team of nursing students were working/learning on my floor.

In the hospital I had a hard time telling all the health care professionals apart. From my vantage point there were doctors (who I was always eagerly waiting for) and everyone else. The doctors wore white coats and everyone else wore medical scrubs, it was really hard to tell the difference between a nurse, and aide, or the person who fills my water bottle.

I remember almost being in shock when a smiling and exceptionally friendly “professional” entered my room in the morning. I later learned she was a nursing student, and throughout the day I saw other enthusiastic students just like her on the floor. As a patient, it definitely improved my outlook and the feeling about my care.

If I never had the opportunity to interact with the students, I probably wouldn’t have been aware of the stark contrast between them and the majority of health care professionals that I had interacted with. The students weren’t being paid, they wanted to be there, and they clearly wanted to help people. I clearly got the feeling that for some of the nurses answering their many questions was just another annoyance of their “job”. Its sad because the students really put them on a pedestal.

Will that enthusiasm disappear after they are on the “job” and in the system? I am pretty sure it will for many.

 

Once again Jason Popko really got me thinking with his comment on my last post!

When I look at my kids aged 3 and 6 sleeping in their car seats, I am a bit envious. Their seats look incredibly comfortable with extra padding and an ergonomic design to hug your little ones body. These seats make sleeping in a car look better than a bed!. I would definitely pay extra money to have an adult sized car seat on my next cross country flight!

Stroller design is following the same track. The current strollers on the market are also designed with attention to safety and the comfort of the child. Strollers are also designed with special attention to the parent offering adjustable positioning, padding, and countless features designed for ease and convenience.

So what are strollers? They are wheelchairs for people who can’t walk YET. 

So what COULD wheelchairs be? They could be strollers for people who have difficulty walking.  

Most of these people CAN talk, they CAN reason, and they HAVE a history and stories to tell.  When you are strolling with one of these people you have the potential for a rich dialogue and a learning experience.

The role of dads in the delivery room has dramatically changed in the last few decades. When I was born in the 1960s I think that it was standard practice to be drinking at the bar across the street with your buddies instead of holding your wife’s hand in the delivery room!

Now it’s common practice now to take up residence in the maternity ward with mom for the entire duration of her stay. In fact nearly every room has a chair or sofa that converts into a bed for dad.

In elder care its common practice to “drop off” our parents when they move to a senior living residence or nursing home. What if we started applying the same logic that has progressed in the maternity wing and started spending the first few nights with our elders to make the transition easier? Chairs or sofas could be bought by communities and made as an option to encourage friends and families to consider staying the first few nights. Maybe it could be a slumber party with the grandchildren spreading out sleeping bags on the floor so that when grandma wakes she sees a bunch of familiar faces instead of an intimidating door that leads to an unfamiliar setting.

I intentionally separated myself from my family in my move. However, if it wasn’t an immersion project I would have loved to see my kids in my room in the morning and I would have proudly enjoyed taking them down to breakfast and introducing them to my new neighbors!

 

Our ProAging meeting last week at The Fairfax in Ft. Belvoir, VA featured Ben Cornthwaite, the 30 year old administrator of the nursing home at Greenspring, a Continuing Care Retirement Community (CCRC) in Springfield, VA.  You can read about some of the details of his project here.

Over 100 senior-serving professionals were treated to Ben’s inspirational account of living as a resident in the nursing home that he manages to better understand how care is delivered and serve as a platform to help him improve as a leader.

The environment, setting, and approach to Ben’s immersion was different from my project. So I was excited to be able to apply his observations to the framework of the 8 Ps that I used to reflect on my project to expand my insights. Nora Nagatani also posted a entry on her blog sharing some of her thoughts about Ben’s presentation, click here to access.

A few of the highlights of Ben’s presentation included:

Ben talked about how he was intimately familiar with so many aspects of the community that he has managed, but was surprised at how much he now saw through the eyes and perspective of a resident.

While Ben was always impressed by the staff and people in his community prior to this project, he was even more impressed from his new vantage point as a resident.

Ben went through this experience living in a wheelchair, and he shared some video of him navigating daily aspects in his room (going to the bathroom, getting clothes out of a dresser and closet) with a bit of difficulty due to the design and layout of the room. He was not fully aware of these issues because the staff does such a good job in taking care of the residents needs. He raised the issue that improved access and design can enable residents to take care of their own needs better if they choose.

Ben helped me become more aware of how our industry can often strive to do everything for our residents and clients, whether they want the services or not. I have a better awareness of how this can sometimes take away one of our primary purposes in life to help ourselves and others.

Ben shared that they were able to improve access with some very inexpensive modifications and by simply moving furniture around.

Ben also gained a new awareness of the disruption that a resident faces in periodic checks and medication administration during the middle of the night. Again, it represents our desire to help our residents without a full awareness of all the implications. Ben commented several times in his presentation that residents and families accept a lot of these practices as “the way it is” and don’t voice their concern or realize that could be an alternative. It speaks to the power that the system and management can unknowingly place over residents.

Again, Ben shared that after reviewing check in and medication disbursement practices they were able to easily enhance and respect the residents lifestyle and independence better.

At the beginning of Ben’s presentation he shared that a “compliment” that he and other nursing homes might receive is that “this place is great - it doesn’t smell”. He pondered how we would all feel if someone came into each of our homes with a similar “compliment”. Ben’s approach and positive attitude to better understand the care that he and his team are providing is remarkable in our industry. We need to celebrate the pioneering efforts of leaders like Ben … and encourage others in his position to learn and follow his example.

 

I have referenced the Draisin bikes several times on this blog. However until last week I had never actually ridden the bikes. At last weeks ProAging meeting I had the opportunity to help valet many senior-serving professionals from the parking lot to the event thanks to John Bruno at Bikes at Vienna. It was fantastic experience!

We were able to provide rides and demos to professionals and residents and everyone loved the bikes. It was great to see all the residents peeking out their windows at us and answering questions about the bikes.

After seeing the look on a residents face that they were actually enjoying a bike ride, I am convinced that these bikes should be standard issue in communities across the country!

Here is a picture of me providing valet service to Nora Nagatani. Nora also did a wonderful post on her blog about the event, click here for access.

After making my last post I was reminded that Home Depot recently announced that they had to drop out of the Olympic Jobs Opportunities Program, click here for the story.

How ideal would it be for a community to have a few olympic athletes in training that were living and potentially working in a community. The benefits to the athlete and the residents could be endless.

If you have been following my blog you should know that my feeling on what really needs to be changed in senior living is to have younger people living (not working or visiting) alongside the elders. Less segregation by age and ability.

Take a look at this story about a minor league baseball player who got "placed" in an assisted living community instead of the more typical host family scenario.

This story illustrate the importance of purpose in all of our lives. Look at how one small change to this community has given new purpose to the entire community. Its exciting to see how the stigma of this community has changed by simply adding one new resident.

This quote from the article says alot about the state of senior living, but it also says alot about how easy it is for us to change our "system".

Eighty-four-year-old Meda Dennis, who has been living in the center for four years, said Faiola’s arrival is the most exciting thing to happen since a good Elvis impersonator showed up.

"It’s been quite exciting because he’s young and new and interesting and we’re old," she joked.

Josh and his teammates think he is lucky because he has a nice apartment with a washer and dryer, but simply by moving in he has given an entire community new purpose. The support and love that he will recieve by delivering such a gift should have his teammates wanting to sleep in the hallways to grasp on to some of that mojo!

Why should this stop with one resident? What if we reversed the scenario and created a "dormitory" for minor league players that also happens to be the home for some elders as well. Can you imagine the reception that a new player would receive on move in day when he is being sent down from the majors or his first day in a new city? Better yet, put the community right next to the ballfield and let the elders help with the stadium operations! Now its not a "old folks home" anymore, its a vibrant and unique community where the residents support each other and have a purpose.

Josh is a headline grabbing story, that I have no doubt is being discussed in a few Hollywood boardrooms as I type.  I hope that every minor league sports team starts looking at the senior living communities in their area for similar placements for their players.  The same thing can be accomplished with the integration of less noteable residents.Think of all the other programs that might be created for exchange students, foster children, college interns, business people on extended projects, individuals going through a divorce or separation could provide residents with purpose and benefit from the wisdom and support of the elders.

Cindy Griffiths-Novak the catalyst of this project is my hero!

I was really excited to have made a connection several months ago through this blog with an innovative architect named David Dillard who is President of CSD Architects.

In an effort provide better design and build in a more responsive manner, David’s firm is sending each member of its senior living architectural design team (approx. 36 architects) to stay overnight in a variety of senior living communities across the country. They have titled this as the “Sleepover Project”.  The “sleepers” will spend their time on site fully and physically experiencing what it’s like to be a resident in that community.  Upon arrival, the Sleeper will be assigned a specific medical condition and will then assume the limitations of that condition and experience a simulated version of its treatment and care.  Conditions may range from a stroke victim having partial paralysis to an Alzheimer’s patient receiving Memory Care.  Sleepers will participate in the community’s daily life for a full 24 hour period, and the varying levels of service and activities will accommodate their condition and corresponding lifestyle.”

David kicked off this project by “sleeping over” at a nursing center in Los Altos, CA. He shared his journal entry with me and I loved reading this statement, “In the big scheme of things, even the PERFECT building won’t matter THAT much.  Just as the perfect school building does not guarantee a perfect education, nor the perfect hospital healing, in the end it’s not about the architecture.  It is about the players within them – the students, the teachers, the patients, and the doctors - the people.”  I love his comparison to the players in a school. I have found some of my most profound thoughts come from comparing our system of elder services to our education and youth services. There is a stark difference from the stigma of these two worlds, yet they are both tremendously important to our progression as a society. I agree that the architecture pales in comparison to the people, but I am excited that we have designers stepping up to create design that will potentially provide a "better" setting for the us, the people that are living and working in these homes.

David and I both share the same awe for the rich history and wisdom that our fellow residents have and I feel the realization that their stories need to be told and more people need to reach out and connect with these elders.

I applaud the spirit of this project, I hope that more organizations and professionals in a variety of disciplines follow our lead by experiencing the services and settings that are serving "elders" first hand. I still am shaking my head at how easy it is was to detach myself from this process that I was regarded to be an "expert" in.  If architects are building homes for elders that they are not living in themselves or that they are not willing to live in, then we clearly have detachment at the most important process of design. I look forward to seeing the change that David and his team at CSD impose on design with this innovative project. Hopefully the end result will be the creation of "homes" designed for "us" and not for "them".

 

I have made several presentations to groups on my project recently. Last week I presented the project to a group of about 170 social workers, senior-serving and health care professionals at the annual Social Work Luncheon held at Vinson Hall in Mclean, VA. 

My presentation was taped and edited into 3 digestable segments.

Segment 1 - Introduction, Inspiration, Everyone Is Aging, The 7 P’s, Perspective, Possessions

Segment 2 - Pricing, Proximity, Purpose, People, Positive Attitude

Segment 3 - The Stigma of Aging, Questions

Vic made a great comment on my last post related to transportation. He relates to life in Switzerland where his grandmother lived, he says:

"Public transportation and bikes, yes bikes even for older people, and lots of walking, is really a preferred method of transportation."

This a great opportunity to give a plug for an innovative German made bike manufacturer, Draisin. Take a look at these bikes, they could enable a caregiver and a person with or without mobility issues to enjoy some fresh air and make a smaller carbon footprint! I hope that some senior living communities begin to adopt these great bikes, they are sure to turn some heads! If you are interested in learning more, click here.

“It reminds me of my first day of prep school, and college. Sounds like a whirlwind day.”

I figured I would start my "reflection" process with this comment. I have been comparing the move to senior housing options with the move to college for many years.

Many times a student making the transition to a new school or college will start with a group of other new students at the same time. I was the only person transitioning into Paul Spring during my week, which might be compared to switching schools mid-semester! Paul Spring staff did share that it’s nice when they get a few new residents moving in during the same week or month.

While I didn’t have the comrade of a bunch of other new “students” on my “hall”, I was able to forge a bond with my new neighbors by sharing my experience of making the transition with them. It was interesting listening to how everyone made their transition; each story was a little different. A common theme was the strategy of moving to a smaller living environment and prioritizing what belongings to take with them. Everyone living in Paul Spring has the common experience of making the transition from a home that is familiar, to their new home at Paul Spring. I see this as a great way for any new resident to bond with each other no matter what community you are moving to. Also, I really like to have an "ice breaker" or a "line" to get things going - talking to people I don’t know is not very easy!

When I reflect on my years in school and college, rarely do I recount any of the physical aspects of those environments like my dorm room, the size of the classrooms, or a fountain on campus. I usually recount my friends, maybe a teacher, road trips, or events I attended as a student. As I review my blog postings during my week at Paul Spring, I see the same thing. Everything I did was focusing on meeting my neighbors and trying to make connections that would make my time there more fulfilling. While I did attend nearly every activity offered, it clearly was a quest to make connections with other residents.

There is no other community or neighborhood in the world that has the same residents (and staff) as Paul Spring. This is the fingerprint that makes each retirement community unique and different. My week reinforced my thoughts that this is one of the most important aspects should be evaluated when considering this transition.

The activities director of Paul Spring had prepared a “scrapbook” that includes a one page biography of most of the residents of the community. This was fascinating to read, and it gave me an easy way to engage some residents in conversation. Ask if there is something like this in communities you might be considering – I have seen very elaborate community biographies created by residents.

So if we are making the comparison to college, where is the academics and learning? You can see that there were activities I participated in with a focus on learning (like the museum trip). It’s my opinion, that this and other communities like it are full of “teachers”!  I see tremendous opportunities in connecting residents with people eager to learn about the subjects that they had passion for through their lifetime. It benefits the recipients of the knowledge, and it gives residents and important “purpose”. I certainly learned alot!

Just a reminder that these are simply my thoughts and opinions based on my personal experience. I hope that these might help trigger ideas, questions or comments that will help us make the world a better place for everyone that is aging!