Everyone is Aging Blog

I had never heard of the term “Elder Orphans” until recently. There are about 10 million seniors in the U.S. who live alone. Most still have family members, but about 15 percent of seniors who need care have no family support. Even if that percentage remains constant, the sheer number of elder orphans will grow thanks to the massive changes in our population.

Yesterday I heard an interesting program on NPR related to adoption. Scott Simon recounted the challenges of adopting a child in this country if you are “older”.  He detailed how “older people” might have an easier time adopting a foster child.  This has led many to adopt children overseas. 

This Interesting generational parallel made me reflect on the similarities between Elder Orphans and Foster Children and the connections that we should all be making with both.  One of my favorite examples that integrate both is the Hope Meadows Community This community integrates elders with families and foster children to create a intentional supportive neighborhood.

It’s been estimated that nearly 60% of nursing home residents don’t have anyone visiting them each year. There are programs in many regions around the country that visit residents of nursing homes who don’t have families.  We need more of these programs especially with a focus on helping develop meaningful relationships for the residents and not just “visiting” elders.

 

The other day I learned that a senior apartment building in Northern Virginia, The Marque at Heritage Hunt  had lifted its age restriction.  I spoke with the manager last week and it seems that the primary motivator for this change centered on financing issues that made it more beneficial to make the shift a traditional apartment building.

To my knowledge, this is the first community in the mid-Atlantic region to make a transition like this in my 20 year career, so I am extremely curious to see how this story plays out.

The community has never reached full occupancy, but they do report more inquiries after the change.  Although the first 14 month old child will soon be living in the building, I doubt that there will be an influx of families with children lining up to move in, but you never know. I am very interested in how young families and elders will benefit from this change or complexities that arise in the community.

I actually think that this community will have an easier time attracting the type of resident that they have been targeting since their opening.  I feel that one of the best ways to market a community for seniors is not to have a sign in front that says it’s exclusively for seniors! 

A transition like this may be a bit challenging, after all the existing residents bought into the concept of age restrictions when they moved in.  There is sure to be some anxiety in some peoples minds that opening their doors to younger people will dramatically change the community.

I hope to follow the story of this community on this blog. What are your thoughts on this change? Would you like to see this in other communities?

Photo credit: L. Roger Turner an entry in the 2004 Generations United photo contest, click here for more information Generations United and their annual photo contest.

USA Today reports that "an increasing number of developers struggling to find older residents for their 55-plus housing communities have relaxed the age restrictions to attract younger home buyers."

It looks like the developers referenced in the article are discovering that there are more market benefits to be had by creating a multi-generational community.

Now, can someone get a copy of this article down to Florida to this community? Click here for the story about the grandchild being evicted from a retirement community.

“The generation gap is an immensely misleading term. It implies that people from different generations are inherently different whereas people within a generation are inherently similar.”

This quote is from a University of Michigan student, and is just one of the good “nuggets” from the book Aging Awakenings: Assisted Living Residents Teach University Students to Overcome Ageism by Richard C. Adelman, Ph.D. which details the thoughts, ideas, and transitions of students and residents involved in an innovative program that engages college students and the residents of a senior living community.

The book details a research project that studied the thoughts and views of over 60 students at the University of Michigan. The project first had students share their thoughts on aging, which not surprisingly revealed a bias towards stereotypes that most of the elderly have cognitive and physical challenges, and that the majority of the elderly have conservative and stubborn mindsets, etc. Then each of the students engaged in a year long program where they were matched up with residents of University Living.

At the end of the program it was fairly conclusive that the experience debunked the majority of the previously held stereotypes. Every student that previously regarded the elderly as conservative, or felt that the elderly did not have the ability to learn new things before they entered the program had discarded those viewpoints at the end.

What’s’ even more exciting is the new things that the student learned from their relationships in the senior community. They overwhelmingly reported that they admired the elder’s skills in conflict resolution, their insights on death, and to many students a big surprise was that they found their insights on love and sex tremendously helpful.

I found many of the insights in this book in alignment with my own experiences in senior living communities and many of the thoughts that we discuss on this blog. Armed with the mindset that “everyone is aging”, it will be exciting to see how the students that participated in this program can help change the world and views of aging. Lets hope that programs like this will soon be required courses on campuses across the county – and imagine the all the great engagement with elders that can take place if that happens.

I highly recommend this book to staff and management of senior living communities, it should help them think differently about the value of the residents and an example of engagement with the community in a positive way.

Click here to order the book

 

I have been legally blind in one eye since birth. This summer I became totally blind in that eye due to a cataract. Since I have never had clear vision I didn’t think it would effect me that much, but it has. Because of my unique situation my Ophthalmologist was hesitant to perform surgery.

Last week I traveled to a premier medical center for an appointment with a doctor that has a lot of experience with difficult cataracts. The first “funny” thing that happened was what I saw when I walked into the medical center. If I didn’t know I was in a hospital I would swear that I had just walked into a bank lobby. It truly looked like they were able to get a deal on furniture and fixtures from a failing bank!

After completing enough paperwork and searches on my insurance to qualify for a fixed rate jumbo loan I headed up for my exam.

I was pleased to see a copy of AARP magazine in the waiting room. Since I am 44 years old, I can’t technically join AARP, therefore my only opportunity to read the magazine is at my in-laws house or in the doctor’s office. That’s the second "funny" thing, that the publisher of a "retirement" magazine and a guy that has spend several weeks in senior living communities doesnt get a subscription to AARP.

The editors note in the February issue was great, Nancy Perry Graham introduced me to the term, “chronological racism” when telling a story about her AARP colleagues attending a Springsteen concert wearing their AARP tee shirts. Ironically, I can accuse AARP of chronological racism by not letting someone like me (under 50) join their group!   It’s a shame because the articles and resources are really good no matter what your age.

So how does all this tie into the blog? This issue also featured an article on 10 individuals who inspire to make the world a better place. I am pleased that they featured Brenda Krause Eheart, the founder of Hope Meadows which is one of the Everyone Is Aging Honor Roll members.

Oh, almost forgot to mention, my surgery is scheduled for March 10th!

When I run into readers of this blog, usually the question comes up, "What ever happened to the little girl in the retirement community?" The little girl is Kimberly Broffman, the 6-year-old grandaughter of residents living in an age-restricted retirement community in Florida. The homeowners association of the community is in a brutal battle with the family and the potential that Kimberly might be assigned to a foster family is a real threat.

The good news is that the family is still together, and according to this article the family received some well wishes and support in the form of gifts from neighbors, care groups and school faculty during this holiday season. Hopefully the Broffmans will either sell their home or the homeowners association will make an important exception in the near future, we will keep you updated on this one!

Here is the video that will make you question the concept of age restricted living!